The Outrageous Pizza Heist

Last night we held a pizza party for the LL.M. students and their families at Steve’s Pizza in downtown Davis. We crammed a group of over 40 in the back room along with 14 large pizza’s. It was quite the sight. We were so numerous the restaurant actually ran out of glasses and was giving out clear plastic picnic cups to customers.

C and I were visiting after the party so I invited her to come join us for pizza. Near the end of the evening C, A (my assistant) and I were standing to one side of the room visiting with some of the Korean judges, I noticed a strange woman in a white shirt out of the corner of my eye. A moment later she came walking past me holding two pieces of pizza in a napkin. I watched her walk past dumbfounded then turned to C and A, “I think that woman took some of our pizza.” Sure enough we observed her circle around the table and take a seat at a booth inches from our table. With our six eyes on her she reaches to our table and takes another piece from the pizza tray. She startled our French LL.M. student, F, who is sitting right next to the dish. F glances at the three of us watching (by this time we are all staring down the lady) from across the room with a look of bemusement. When the woman indicates to the boy who materializes beside her that he should also take a piece from the tray F becomes concerned. Meanwhile my fellow observers and I are debating if we should say something to the woman and her son. We continue to stare and discuss as I notice a man in a red shirt standing against the wall nearby obviously taking stock of the large amount of pizza still available on our tables. Simultaneously the woman notices us and pulls a ten dollar bill out of her purse, says something to the boy and sends him away from the booth. I know she noticed us and I breath a sigh of relief thinking she is sending him to pay us for the pizza they stole. The boy stops to say something to the red-shirt man and proceeds to the counter to purchase drinks for the family. The man then circles the table. I rushed to the counter and asked for 6 boxes. There is a mad dash effort from C, A, myself, and several of the students (who have seen what is going on) to pack up all the pizza before the man sweeps in so the students can take the pizza home.

Defeated, and hopefully feeling guilty, the family exits the room (but not before checking out the pizza situations with other groups nearby). A reports the woman had the presence of mind to ask one of the students who exactly is in our group and what our party was for. She then made some off-hand comment about them joining the wrong group – lies and slander.

By this time we are all highly bemused. After everyone else has departed, C and I are standing at the counter so I can pay the bill when the birthday guest of a large party in the other room walks in to shouts of “Happy Birthday”. Right behind him I see the smiling bobbing head of the woman in white. I remark to C, “It looks like perhaps they really were with the wrong party”. However, as we exit I noticed the family is nowhere to be found. But, there they are seated with their drinks and empty napkins at a table outside waiting for their next unsuspecting victims.